- Schizophrenia: Do You Hear What I Hear, the Voices, the Voices?
- Amnesia: I Don't Remember If I'll be Home for Christmas
- Narcissistic: Hark the Herald Angels Sing about Me
- Manic: Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants And...
- Multiple Personality Disorder: We Three Queens Disoriented Are
- Paranoid: Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Us
- Borderline Personality Disorder: You Better Watch Out, You Better not Shout, I'm Gonna Cry, and I'll not Tell You Why
- Full Personality Disorder: Thoughts of Roasting You On an Open Fire
- Obsessive Compulsive Disorder: Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells
- Agoraphobia: I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House
- Senile Dementia: Walking In a Winter Wonderland Miles from My House in My Slippers and Robe
- Oppositional Defiant Disorder: I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House
- Social Anxiety Disorder: Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate
- Attention Deficit Disorder: We Wish You..... Hey Look!! It's Snowing
And to one and all, a very Merry . . . wow! It IS snowing!!!
